Surgery is a total of 17 days away (Okay once it hits midnight it’s 17…leave me alone) I thought I’d share my hallucination I mean vision. This will be quick.
I was driving in the mom tank (a.k.a. the mini-van) and I was by myself which ZOMG ya’ll is a G.D. treat. I started to think about the surgery that is so close I can taste it (let me tell you surgery tastes like the smell of new-born babies..don’t say ICK think about it, is there anything better than the smell of babies not dirty diaper ones but freshly bathed and powered babies. AMAZING) and in my mind’s eye I saw the van filled with car seats (2 possibly 3 if the fertility Gods smile upon this old girl!) and while I only saw one child, a boy (OF COURSE) the vision of him was clear, a healthy PERFECT, baby / toddler boy with Mikes looks (and his sense of style…Steel Magnolia fans anyone? anyone?) little legs hanging out, and he was playing peak a-boo with me. When I think about this vision I well up. It was a flash, but it was there. It wasn’t a memory locked in my brain that fired and called forth, I felt like God was showing me a small glimpse just to get me through.
Maybe I’m crazy, or have a tumor, or am baby crazy. But regardless that vision is what I’m working toward. 17 days little one. 17 days till we can try to make you real.
Love you baby.