This weekend has been rough, perhaps it’s my advancing pregnancy or it’s the medicine that is allowing me to stay pregnant either way I am dreadfully sick. Friday I clawed my way through the work day came home and slept for 3 hours. In my bed. I never do this, but my room is always cold and the nausea and the spinning warranted cool air. It makes you feel drunk, hung over, wildly unstable on every front and has some of the most unpleasant side effects that you’ll ever experience. OH I forgot the fatigue. The I can’t stay awake no matter what but when it’s normal bed time I’m WIDE ASS AWAKE, tired as a dog, fatigue. Vicious cycle. The sickness is so bad, I cannot open my refrigerator, or even take my prenatal vitamins because seriously they gross me the hell out. If I walk across my house I have to sit down…….
SO as I was lamenting on my woe’s of the medicine it hit me, shut the “F” up. There are so many women who would give the teeth to be this sick, I was one of them. I paid a hell of a lot of money to be in this situation, we are blessed beyond measure. This medicine is keeping our little one in there hopefully until his / her birthday but it’s at least giving us a shot. I need to stop the complaining. I would really really love some Zofran to knock down the sickness and at least let me WALK without feeling like I’m going to pass out. HA!
I read a lot of IF blogs and it made me see how selfish I really am being. All women know that pregnancy is ugly, it’s not all happy baby bumps and cuteness, it’s raw, painful, scary, and it makes you sick. It’s hard on everyone including but not limited to your husband / partner. One of the unpleasant side effects of Crinone is it kills your sex drive, and even if the medicine didn’t the manner of administration (ahem) doesn’t really make you want to burn up the sheets. I know that before Crinone anything bedroom related was scary for hubs and this may be TMI but we have a really great bedroom life. NOW? NOT.SO.MUCH. Sigh. Again this is a price you pay. He gets that, but I feel bad, for me I have no desire. Him…well he’s a man. HA!
Bringing new life into this world is just plain tricky, the process is beautifully simply and incredibly complex, it’s filled with emotions and pain and unmeasurable amounts of joy. Everytime I post here about my pregnancy my heart aches a bit for the women out there waiting to be sick, who would give everything to be me. I think about all of you, I pray that you get your BFP. That your pregnancy is seen all the way to the end. (and I vow to NEVER EVER wish you a sticky bean because that bugs me when others say it!)